It's not fair. In theory, being sick like this is supposed to be a little bit enjoyable. You're supposed to get to put your life on hold and just sleep for millions of hours and have people prepare soup for you and watch "Ferris Bueller" on repeat until your sinuses clear up and you see life with a renewed sense of appreciation.
I'm in Colorado, and I'm about to get on a plane. Well, I'm going to INFECT EVERYONE ON THAT PLANE because I simply cannot stop throwing up or having a fever or being unable to breathe. And I should have invested in some of that "NyQuil" stuff because I freaking CAN'T SLEEP FOR THE LIFE OF ME.
Nothing about being sick like this is fun. I am also out of sick days at work. So tomorrow I have to go to work and feel like shit for the whole day, which SUCKS. I am NOT A HAPPY PERSON RIGHT NOW.
I did get licked in the face by a real-life giraffe. Also, my sister is the most amazing and impressive human being I have ever met. I am completely amazed by her in every possible way. More on this soon.
here is the story of how my parents fell in love. my mom made my dad pancakes, and then she wanted him to marry her. he was like, "woman, don't tie me down." so she said, "if you don't marry me, i'm moving to japan." and then she did.
my dad was okay for about five minutes. then he went to japan after her and proposed. they got married on a boat going to russia, wearing the kinds of outfits people wear in the sixties. they didn't know any of their wedding guests!
then they hitchhiked across europe for their honeymoon.
at some point, they realized they were so cool that they ought to spawn.